Gratitude can be exhausting. Some days it just takes so much effort to stop the negative feedback loop, you know? Especially when I’m tired. I am wiped today. And yet it makes me grateful when I think of crawling into my bed. I just changed the sheets and it feels marvelous. I’m grateful to have my little oasis of an apartment, even if I do complain that it’s too small. At least it’s mine.
On a related note, I’ve picked up Gretchen Rubin’s book The Happiness Project. I am intrigued, but also dubious — mostly dubious of my own will to put anything from the book into practice. The expectation that one will be or should be happy most of the time strikes me as an unhelpful illusion. But I also want tools that will help me pay attention and enjoy what I have, even when life is hard. Anyway, it seems relevant to this project, so I’ll report on any wisdom I glean.